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self help

30 Things You Can Do to Bust-A-Rut Today

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30 Things You Can Do to Bust-A-Rut Today

I recently read Choose Yourself by James Altucher, and it is one of my all-time favorite books because of the message he sends and the way he delivers it. There is a portion of the book where he gets pretty raw and talks about getting off the floor, or being at bottom, and this is at the beginning of the book because it needs to be addressed immediately.

I'm going to be pretty honest with you: I HAVE BEEN THERE. 

Before I became the much more confident person I am today, I went through a pretty rough patch. We'll call it a major quarter-life crisis. I had been laid off from a job I loved (Thanks a lot, 2008 recession!), and I'd moved halfway across the country to a city where I knew no one except my boyfriend at the time. Now, while this ended up being a great move for me, it was initially insanely lonely. My boyfriend and I were Fire and Ice: sounds great and exciting in theory... but in reality, they just don't "mesh well". I had found a new job, but it was full of bullies and people with toxic energy, and I didn't enjoy the work. To top it off, I had body image issues up the wazoo that I thought I'd dealt with but that I realized were still lingering on. I was lonely... and I was devastatingly depressed and angry. All of the time.

So one day, I slumped to the floor in my bathroom (gross), and I didn't get up for about 72 hours. I didn't eat. I maybe had a glass of water, from a dingy glass that had been in the bathroom for a month. (Also gross.) I had let everyone tell me what I should do, and how I should do it, and who I was or was expected to be as a person for SO LONG that I sank under the weight of everyone's expectations. I didn't even know myself anymore, or what I even wanted for myself. It was like that part in Eat, Pray, Love where Elizabeth Gilbert says "I didn’t want to destroy anything or anybody. I just wanted to slip quietly out the back door, without causing any fuss or consequences, and then not stop running until I reached Greenland.” 

I literally wanted to move away where no one would know me and my story could start over. This was a pretty huge "woe is me" moment. It was also when I finally realized that I had to learn how to care for and heal myself.

I'm telling you this because you need to know that if this is where you are - at bottom, on the floor - I HAVE BEEN THERE. You are not alone. And there is an important message for you here...

YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE YOURSELF. 

I'm giving you the green light to be a little bit selfish (in a GOOD way)! You have to choose to move forward. Choose to get up. Choose to treat yourself AND everyone else around you like the amazing people you/they are. Choose to do one thing today that will get you out of your rut. Then tomorrow, do two things. Just do one thing at a time and the change will happen. But you have to choose to make healing yourself, being the BEST VERSION OF YOURSELF NON-NEGOTIABLE, because you are really, truly the only one that can help yourself. And in being the best version of yourself, that is when you'll really impact other people in an amazing, inspiring way just by being you. 

If this is where you are right now, I'm giving you my personal list (for FREE!) of the top 30 Things I Did (and that YOU can do) to Break Out of Your Rut. I hope this list of ideas helps you as much as it helped me. Make doing that one thing per day non-negotiable, make healing and growing non-negotiable. 

P.S. - I have something new coming out within the next month!

It's an awesome NEW PROGRAM that I'm so excited to launch. It is going to be an awesome opportunity to experience some major self-transformation and bust out of your career rut. So stay tuned for more news on it soon!

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Busy Doing What?

We're on an extended trip visiting family in Chicago. We live in Denver, and most of our family lives in or near Chicago. Usually our visits are about a week at most which leaves us really scrambling to see everyone and do everything, and often... we don't see or do everything that we want to, and I always used to leave feeling exhausted... and a little guilty. One of my major items on My List of Ultimate Adventures (P.S. Do you have one of these? If not, you probably should!) is to spend more time with my family and friends and not feel rushed, tired or guilty at the end. When we feel rushed, we're more likely not to enjoy the experience fully.

For the longest time, I couldn't seem to make enough time for the visits. I was on everyone else's schedule - my boss's, my company's, my family's, my friends'... my Ego's. I had my priorities way out of whack... and I felt it everywhere. I was stressed, sad, guilty, lonely, resentful way more than I cared to admit.

Then my own Success Coach gave me a wake up call. "What's stopping you from spending time with the people that you love, from honoring your highest priority or deepest desire?" This was one of those GET OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY moments that was the definition of enlightening. 

God, how I needed that reality check. When we don't spend time doing things that make us happy (Hello! Traveling! Reading! Watching Bones!), being with people we love, or owning our thoughts AND actions, we're left totally to the wolf. And I mean the big, bad one that lives inside you that feeds on worry, negativity, anxiety, doubt and fear. That wolf doesn't need to eat you alive, but he/she would flipping love to. I'd been a voluntary meal for that wolf for a long time when I finally got my arse in gear and took myself off the table. 

Fast forward a year, and here we are. We are only in week 2 of our 6-week stay in Chicago, and all I can say is that we've been Busy! I mean, like more busy than just "I have a toddler: I'm always busy!" But, a GOOD kind of busy for once! And it's all about prioritizing and making your desires happen, and then owning Time and your Thoughts. My two Big T's that my clients learn about in Success Coaching. We're visiting friends, going to the lake for about a week, enjoying the city, going for walks every day, eating well, and enjoying our time here. 

You have the ability to prioritize and then work toward making this ownership of time happen. You can plan the trips you want to plan, spend time with the people you want to see, do the things you want to do with your Time. We are given opportunities to take action, to make our deepest dreams and desires come to fruition every day. We just need to take action on them. I know that sounds like some fluffy B.S. I used to feel that way, too. But once you hit bottom, and you realize you have to be willing to accept help in the form of a Mentor/Coach and new way of thinking and then you start practicing it, you realize you weren't living fully until you started it. Being in control of your life is a reality within anyone.

How are you working toward manifesting your desires today? If you're feeling stuck, overwhelmed, like you'll never get there... tell me. My major goal is to make one less person feel that way every day. Allison@AdventureKnocks.com 

"Every day expand in abundance, love and success as you inspire others to do the same." - The Big Leap -

With Love and A Step Forward,

 - Allison

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