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30 Things You Can Do to Bust-A-Rut Today

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30 Things You Can Do to Bust-A-Rut Today

I recently read Choose Yourself by James Altucher, and it is one of my all-time favorite books because of the message he sends and the way he delivers it. There is a portion of the book where he gets pretty raw and talks about getting off the floor, or being at bottom, and this is at the beginning of the book because it needs to be addressed immediately.

I'm going to be pretty honest with you: I HAVE BEEN THERE. 

Before I became the much more confident person I am today, I went through a pretty rough patch. We'll call it a major quarter-life crisis. I had been laid off from a job I loved (Thanks a lot, 2008 recession!), and I'd moved halfway across the country to a city where I knew no one except my boyfriend at the time. Now, while this ended up being a great move for me, it was initially insanely lonely. My boyfriend and I were Fire and Ice: sounds great and exciting in theory... but in reality, they just don't "mesh well". I had found a new job, but it was full of bullies and people with toxic energy, and I didn't enjoy the work. To top it off, I had body image issues up the wazoo that I thought I'd dealt with but that I realized were still lingering on. I was lonely... and I was devastatingly depressed and angry. All of the time.

So one day, I slumped to the floor in my bathroom (gross), and I didn't get up for about 72 hours. I didn't eat. I maybe had a glass of water, from a dingy glass that had been in the bathroom for a month. (Also gross.) I had let everyone tell me what I should do, and how I should do it, and who I was or was expected to be as a person for SO LONG that I sank under the weight of everyone's expectations. I didn't even know myself anymore, or what I even wanted for myself. It was like that part in Eat, Pray, Love where Elizabeth Gilbert says "I didn’t want to destroy anything or anybody. I just wanted to slip quietly out the back door, without causing any fuss or consequences, and then not stop running until I reached Greenland.” 

I literally wanted to move away where no one would know me and my story could start over. This was a pretty huge "woe is me" moment. It was also when I finally realized that I had to learn how to care for and heal myself.

I'm telling you this because you need to know that if this is where you are - at bottom, on the floor - I HAVE BEEN THERE. You are not alone. And there is an important message for you here...

YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE YOURSELF. 

I'm giving you the green light to be a little bit selfish (in a GOOD way)! You have to choose to move forward. Choose to get up. Choose to treat yourself AND everyone else around you like the amazing people you/they are. Choose to do one thing today that will get you out of your rut. Then tomorrow, do two things. Just do one thing at a time and the change will happen. But you have to choose to make healing yourself, being the BEST VERSION OF YOURSELF NON-NEGOTIABLE, because you are really, truly the only one that can help yourself. And in being the best version of yourself, that is when you'll really impact other people in an amazing, inspiring way just by being you. 

If this is where you are right now, I'm giving you my personal list (for FREE!) of the top 30 Things I Did (and that YOU can do) to Break Out of Your Rut. I hope this list of ideas helps you as much as it helped me. Make doing that one thing per day non-negotiable, make healing and growing non-negotiable. 

P.S. - I have something new coming out within the next month!

It's an awesome NEW PROGRAM that I'm so excited to launch. It is going to be an awesome opportunity to experience some major self-transformation and bust out of your career rut. So stay tuned for more news on it soon!

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How Harry Helped Me Get Over My Fear of Public Speaking

When I was young I hated reading aloud in class. I dreaded when my teacher would tell us we were going to do Popcorn Reading. While I actually could read and write very, very well, when I had to read aloud in front of anyone I would stutter, blush and sound like I couldn't read at all.

Queue: EYE ROLL.

Really, I had a terrible fear of speaking in front of the class or any strangers (in large or small groups) for a very long time.

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I couldn't talk to a boy without my face fully blushing until I graduated college.

 

Reading Harry Potter changed all of that. While I had always devoured books silently, often reading through the night, JK Rowling's works really had me thoroughly enjoying every second. I was, and am, in awe of her ability to be so creative. It still stuns me.

When I had Finn, I knew exactly what I would read aloud to him. He's only 14 months old and already I have so much fun using all different voices and accents to tell him the story so that it's truly entertaining. This did a tremendous thing for me... without me realizing it; it helped me get over my fear of public speaking.

You're told over and over again how you'll "grow out of things" or that it'll "get easier". And for new parents, you're constantly told "having a baby changes everything." [EYE ROLL.] This was one thing that changed for me, that I grew out of, that got easier. It may not be a room full of people who I'm reading aloud to, but at least it's a start.

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A Bucket List Must-Read: Flavia de Luce

My latest obsession: Flavia de Luce. She's bold, smart, loves chemistry, solves crimes.. AND she's 11 years old.

I'm only finished with the first book in the series, and I have to read more. The quirky language, and the amazing character were all developed by Alan Bradley, who even said she started as a side character in another novel and actually took hold of his mind, so instead he created another whole world entirely around young Flavia.

Why is reading the rest of the series a must do for me? While there's been no shortage of strong women in my life (Leslie Knope, Emma Watson, my friends, my mom... need I go on?) I find myself gravitating toward Flavia.

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She's 11 AND all of the above, and despite that, there is no sign of the awkwardness that most girls her age feel. Or do they really feel that? Was it just me who was painfully shy, had braces, wore baggy clothes and was obsessed with my Starter Jacket?

This isn't just a young woman I'd like to add to my own List of Inspirational People. I would love my son to look up to her, too!

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